Silver Lining...

There's something to be said about closing one door and opening another.  Seems that's all I've experiencing lately.  Where one thing ends, another begins.  It's true what they say, when something ends, and you think you're going to be crushed in the emotion of it all, another thing comes your way and the elation and relief far outweighs the pain you had felt. 

Lots of things happen all the time.  Why is it that we only notice those things that either hit us right between the eyes for the good or for the bad?  What happens to all the other moments that happen in between?  There's an entire world of things that go unseen and unnoticed and we're none the wiser.  Why do we not notice the small simple things in life?  Rays of sunlight that hit the sky with beautiful hues of pink and orange, but we don't see it...I digress, back to my thoughts.

I guess the transition between the now and the not yet is most emotionally treacherous in the process, but once you transition, you realize that breathing seems easier, sleep is more restful, your mood that was once so solemn is now suddenly much better...everything is suddenly brighter and more vivid than ever before.

I stop to think about things from the past and all of a sudden I don't remember all the things that pushed me away for all the good things that have come my way so far...and all the things that are coming for that matter.  For once in a very long time I feel like there's a light at the end of the tunnel.  Everything is finally lining up.  It's like I've been holding my breath for a very long time and now I'm sucking in air like I've been oxygen deprived for ages.

Okay, so I'm sitting here wondering why I'm relaxing on the sofa and watching a movie without feeling the pressure to do anything else.  I finally feel like I can exhale.  One asks themselves when does the proverbial dark cloud get lifted from one's personal atmosphere?  Well, there's no set time and there's no set date for this to happen.  All I know is that when it happens, you feel a sudden burst of relief unlike anything you remember happening before.  That's the space I occupy right now.  I am just breathing taking this all in...too afraid to admit that I'm happy, too scared to forget that it cold be taken away in the blink of an eye...even at my own hands.  Guess I shall wade in the still waters of my life right now and enjoy every minute of this wonderful place.